Just another manic Monday 

Wish it were Sunday 

That’s my runday….

Running

Putney and Fulham half marathon. Sweet little race: only 150 entrants. Nice route, but incredibly muddy by the boat houses (N grumpy that his road shoes got mucky), and this slowed us a bit: mud on tarmac is sub-optimal. Twisty, two loops, loads of dogs being walked, we went past Fulham football ground, the old Harrods furniture repository (?depository), Hammersmith Bridge and Putney Bridge. Apart from the fact that the loos in the sports centre really weren’t able to cope and blocked almost instantly, it was really well organised, pleasantly un-clubby (well, there were some super fast people, but there was also a chap wearing  a Chuckle Brothers t-shirt, and another aiming for a World Record fastest half marathon carrying a 60lb pack, which he smashed by 9.5 minutes) and I’d do it again.



 1:59:36, I’m really not at my best running (hardly surprising given how little I’ve done this year), but not too shabby. I have Marlow half next on the pre-IVF hitlist. Next weekend I’m away with friends, and the cottage we’ve rented has no beds and, more importantly, no showers. So no running. There is a limit to what I can achieve with a flannel and a jug. 

Knitting

Preemie hats packed off to send. I am hoping for cutesy-pie photos. Yeah. Forgot to take pictures before packing them up. Managed to photo 3 pairs of socks for ravelry. 

Started socks for A, but they aren’t right for her. I think they will go to live with L or G. Yarn and pattern match beautifully (Socks that Rock Firecracker, Spring Foward socks from Knitty), but the colour is wrong. I have found a better yarn for A (Miss Babs, in the Franklin colour way) And potentially a different pattern (a Socks that Rock sock club pattern by Nancy Bush, think it’s called Checkerboard). 


Oddly, this is the third pair of socks this year where I have failed to get the combination of person/pattern/yarn right first time. The only times I have got it right have been socks for N. I made socks for E, which ended up for me (the turquoise pair above): E ended up with yarn that was destined for me. I made socks for me that have ended up for other L, and went through two different patterns before I was happy. And socks for A now just not quite doing it for her. I had to get a second opinion from F. 

The sock has grown significantly today. Been in a hands-off training day at Microsoft. The ladies were super and found me a gf meal at very short notice.

Books

Nearly finished the Mary Russell novel. Got properly into ‘Mysteries of Udolpho’ rather than falling asleep over it. Started a Bloom County re-read last night because I was too tired to concentrate and too wired to sleep. I have not had a full night’s sleep since this cycle began, and I cannot help but think it is some sort of coincidence. I just feel drained. 

Xxx

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Sunday’s for morris dancing 

Running

Unsurprisingly a less than stellar week, culminating in the intention to run 8 miles yesterday. Managed 2.5 before giving in. I had forgotten how exhausting it is doing both Brownies and Guides on Friday night. Even worse with a 50 mile commute home afterwards. 

IVF 

See previous post. Considering unfollowing SiL on all social media after she complained she is Not Blooming. Decided to rise above it instead. 

Hair

Doesn’t seem to be worsening. Hurrah! Still look like I’ve been through a hedge backwards a lot of the time. 

Knitting 

Finished N’s socks. Thought I’d finished mine, then discovered one was about an inch too long (how, even?). Ripped back. Reknitting toe. Also knitting preemie hats like a demon. Have made 2.5. They are adorable. As are the twins. But Soooooo Tiny!

Books

Decided I was in the mood for Poirot. Started The Mystery of The Christmas Pudding. Thoroughly enjoying myself. Mary Russell also claiming my attention. 

Other

Not sure why I am running Brownies and doing most of the admin for Friday night Guides. Had a three hour session with the girls and then another 45 minutes doing admin. Unsurprisingly was not home before 11pm. Add in inadequate food, and I’m also not surprised that Saturday’s run was a non starter. 

Spent today morris dancing to celebrate the life of Maud Karpeles, who organised the first international folk festival in 1935. Lovely historic tour route, but 7 hours of outside in London is gruelling. 

And I plan to crack out those 8 miles tomorrow? Also planning to work from home…

Xxx

40 days

That’s how long my last cycle was. I am now an emotional, hormonal, mess. I know I ovulated, I had a decent luteal phase. I let myself get hopeful. And I am 99% sure I was pregnant for about a day. 

I could do without bursting into tears for no apparent reason. Fishfinger sandwiches are not a reason to cry. 

We also had an epic pre-IVF appointment yesterday. N’s viral blood work was 2 weeks out of date, which precluded starting on this cycle. Which is just as well, as I just don’t have the emotional wherewithal right now. It also gives me time to organise myself. Acquire pj bottoms large enough to accommodate ovaries the size of oranges (usually, ovaries are the size of walnuts). Acquire a couple of loose dresses and some larger jeans – all from eBay. Clear the calendar for 2 injections a day, which have to be carefully timed. 

Yesterday I also got baby cuddles from the lovely Little N. And moral support from his Mummy. And cake with G. And then there was Rangers, and the 3 of them were awesome. As was leader C. 

It could be a hell of a lot worse. But it doesn’t stop it being sad. Having a bit of hope, then losing it, is horrible. Peeing on a stick to confirm it either way doesn’t really make any difference to how sad I feel. 

Xxx

Sunday runday

Running

I find it helps if you turn up to the race on the correct day. Which was, it transpires, yesterday rather than today. How I got this wrong is beyond me, but Wimbledon Park is currently devoid of race, and I’m going home to fit 9 miles along the canal in before supper. 


Yesterday, I got about 4 hours of sleep, as I was far too wound up after Guides, and could neither get to sleep nor stay asleep. So I wasn’t in anything remotely resembling a fit state to run a half and actually fell asleep on the sofa mid-afternoon…  Either way, it wasn’t meant to be. 

IVF

Period has not shown its face, and is now a week overdue. I suspect I’ve just had another chemical pregnancy, but because I don’t test like some of the mad women in the forums, I never know for sure. I seriously wonder if this is chemical #3 and if I have a lack of progesterone. Wish the wretched thing would show up. I have tested under the severe provocation of being a week late, and it was negative. Not quite sure how I feel about this. 

A friend’s IVF twins have arrived, around 8 weeks early. Two tiny girls, already in their own cot and utterly gorgeous. She looks so happy! Baby hats are in my future. 

Knitting

Finally cast on Autumn Rose at about 6:30am yesterday, when I had given up all hope of getting back to sleep (some days, you just know sleep will be totally elusive. This was one of them).

Finished N’s Boston Marathon socks. Nearly finished my monkeys socks. Those will be done by the time I’m home. 

Reading

Finished Black Dahlia, started a Mary Russell Sherlock Holmes story (love those but I’m trying to ration myself otherwise I’ll run out of them). Also started The Mysteries of Udolpho but fell asleep on page 2. It was late. I was tired. 

Xxx

I’m full of roast potatoes

Running

Achieved the first sub-27 minute parkrun in a long time. Would possibly have been sub 26:30 but my shoelace came undone. N went out for a run at the same time, but was not feeling the crowded parkrun love, so came to cheer me at the end. In his bright yellow Boston top. Wish I’d had a pictute. We went for an 8 miler this morning: 9:19 min/mile while moving (also progress!). He started with a cold. By 2 miles in, it was proto-man-flu. By the end, man-flu and please could we walk the last 3/4 mile home. He is now snuffling on the sofa under a duvet, and we are watching the New England Patriots vs New Orleans. We are supporting New Orleans, who have a fetching fleur de lys motif.

Hair

Asthma meds now changed, biotin definitely doing something as BOB the chin hair has reared his ugly follicle three times since I started it, which is twice too many in the time period. Also: how come only half a millimetre of hair pokes out, but 5mm seems to lurk under the surface, like some sort of hirsute iceberg?

IVF

Holding pattern here. Period currently running late, but we all know that means nothing. SiL announced the arrival of #3 via the family WhatsApp complete with scan photos in the middle of the working day. I retreated to the ladies’ in despair and desperate need of mascara repair. N has declared #3’s to be called Dele Osvaldo Gazza. Due March, I am considering knitting this.

Knitting

Finally blocking the baby blankets for L’s twins. 

Still knitting socks. As usual, as autumn starts, desperate to knit this. A situation ongoing for Six Years FFS. I have the yarn. I spent hours locating the pattern. What is wrong with me?

Reading

Finished Brooklyn by Colm Toibin. Really did not care what happened to Eilis. Enjoying The Black Dalhila by James Ellroy much more. There was a brilliant podcast, Hollywood and Crime, which covered the murder the book’s based round.

Other stuff

My stepfather in law treated us all to an excellent lunch today (buffet carvery at a hotel with valet parking and a lot of people wearing tweed). I had two mains, and 8 roast potatoes. And gravy. Oh my, the gravy. I rather want to go back there. Joint celebration for his birthday and my stepmother out law’s birthday. We were totally outnumbered by her family, but I think C and I won the elegance and well fitted dresses stakes.


Xxx

One week later…

Running

Ran the Farnham Pilgrim half! 2:18:59 – about 10 minutes slower than 2 years ago (when I was training for a marathon…). My heart rate was about the same on this attempt as it was two years ago, and I wasn’t really pushing myself – I didn’t get home from a day’s morris dancing in Tenterden, Kent until just after midnight.  Got a nice medal, a really well fitting tech top (they had size Extra Small!), and just enjoyed myself. And the scenery was gorgeous.  Other than Not Enough Loos, this is the most beautifully organised and marshalled of races: and a brass band playing as you finish, and cakes and bananas at the finish line. Field of about 500, no idea where I came, but I don’t really care. Finished just before it started raining. Made it home safely despite driving on fumes.

IVF

Starts in 6-8 weeks (depends on when the next bar one period arrives). N’s SA looks excellent for IVF, I apparently have the ovaries of a younger woman (go me!). Interestingly, I think I ovulated this month. Go figure.  The next step is more blood tests, and an epic morning filling in paperwork.

I plan to bang out one more half in the next 6-8 weeks.

Hair

Lovely Fiona thinks the hair loss is stress, and has advised a morale-boosting trip to the hairdresser. I hate going to the hairdresser, so I’m not sure this will help. However, when she had stress related hairloss, the hairdresser was lovely.  Still taking the pills (probably not going to have this in the wrap-up unless something astounding happens). Haven’t quite had the GP appointment yet.

Knitting

No real progress. Desperate to knit something else…

Flat

Rented. Embroiled in paperwork. ‘Nuff said.

Books

Nearly finished ‘The Drowned and the Saved’. Not the most cheerful of bedtime reading. But, very very important: because the Holocaust was, hands down, the grimmest part of European History in sheer scale and brutality. And I don’t seem to have had nightmares as a result of reading it – which is odd. Because I feel I should have done. Nearly finished Elif Shafak’s ‘Honour’ as well.

xxx

 

 

Sausage Casserole

Honestly. Get a copy of “Potty” by Clarissa Dickson Wright. It’s full of super one-pot recipes. This is my current favourite (a variation without the potatoes is already on the internet). We had peas and carrots with it. 

Serves 4

  • 4 onions, sliced
  • 1 tbs oil
  • 2 garlic cloves, crushed
  • 900g good sausages
  • 1 400g tin chopped tomatoes
  • 1/2 bottle red wine or 1 bottle beer
  • Salt and pepper
  • 6 medium potatoes, cut in half
  • 75g cheddar cheese

Preheat oven to 180degC/350degF/gas mark 4. In a heavy casserole fry the onions in oil until they’re coloured. Add the garlic and cook a little longer. Brown the sausages in the pan, pour in the alcohol and tomatoes. 

Season, add the potatoes, cover, cook in the oven for an hour. 10 mins before the end, uncover, sprinkle on the cheese and finish. 

Very forgiving on cooking time. 

Xxx